Mean Streets

A bunch of friends were hanging together on East Colfax Avenue, “watching ‘Colfax Science Theater 3000’ walk by,” says mean-street habitue Sam Kohlenberg, when, in the midst of the parade of drunks, hipsters, homeless people and working girls, the conversation hit a “what if” moment, and the Miss Colfax Pageant began to take shape. Somehow, Kohlenberg and his pals wanted to both honor and satirize the less-than-classy milieu with a tongue-in-cheek beauty contest, complete with a Burger King tiara to crown the winner.

“The idea is to lampoon and mock and have fun with the structure and convention of the American beauty pageant,” Kohlenberg explains, and to that end, the competition will more or less follow the traditional beauty-pageant protocol, right down to the Q&A. “We’ll probably start straight, and by the third one ask something totally bizarre and oddball,” he says. There will also be a talent segment, which might include “beer chugging, competitive cigarette bumming and bad jokes.”

The pageant goes down tonight at 8 p.m. at Tooey’s on Colfax, 1521 Marion Street, with music by the Minor Note Orchestra, personalities Sid Pink and Lorin Partridge, and a yet-to-be-determined number of local contestants. Kohlenberg predicts a block-party ambience and snarky fun for all; admission to the 21-and-up party is $3 at the door. For details, go to colfax.me or visit the Facebook event page.
Sat., Sept. 21, 8 p.m., 2013

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.


All-access pass to the top stories, events and offers around town.

  • Top Stories


All-access pass to top stories, events and offers around town.

Sign Up >

No Thanks!

Remind Me Later >