Oh, No, He Didn't!

Foul, foul, foul! We just can't have any fun without The Man sticking his rules where they don't belong. Seriously, in the NBA, you can't even trash-talk without a penalty these days. (Shi', honky — everyone knows that's half the fun.) Well, if you're tired of that no-contact, mind-your-manners version of ballin', then toss the rules to the sidelines and check out Ball4Real, tonight at 7 p.m. at the Pepsi Center, 1000 Chopper Circle.

But this ain't no spectator-only event, either: Starting at 3 p.m., a court set up in the Pepsi Center parking lot will be the site of the Block Party — a hip-hop basketball happening — where a DJ will spin as regular folks compete for the chance to be one of four final Ballers to play in tonight's showdown. Derived from ESPN's Streetball, Ball4Real is kind of a "modern-day Globetrotters," according to spokesman Nathan Bertke. "They do dunks and crossovers and 'no, he didn't' moves." During the game, a DJ spins while the players regale hooting audience members with crazy-good dunks, between-the-legs passes and lots of trash talk. Hell, yeah! Tickets are $25. For more information, go to www.aeglive.com.

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Mark Dragotta