Our Commercial Culture: Jameson's Epic Patriarch

Everyone loves a hero. Add a little mystery and some suspense, and you've got yourself a recipe for an epic tale of valor and woe, which we all love. (If you don't love a tale of valor and woe, you can get the hell off this planet.) The folks at Jameson Irish Whiskey know this, and that's precisely why they've spun a gallant yarn around the mythology of their founding father, John Jameson. This new spot has our stalwart patriarch risking almost certain death to save his beloved whiskey, and inadvertently saving (sort of) everything else.

His passion for whiskey makes us feel like we're wasting our lives. If only we could muster the courage to be willing to die for what we believe in. If only we could believe in something so strongly. Of course, he doesn't die, though, because he's motha-fucking John Jameson. He's like a god: a mythological manly-man that no mere mortal could step to.

He has no desire for riches, nor ambitions for fame, only for the privilege to share his contribution of joy-inducing libation with the world. And for that we toast him every night, alone, in our studio apartment, watching a Ninja Warrior marathon and drinking Old Crow because we can't afford Jameson, and drowning in the sorrows of a wasted life spent chasing the specter that is the American Dream, only to be thwarted at every turn by the insurmountable forces of a churning, globalized economy. We want to run away to Ireland where everything is merry and gamesome even when the city has just been incinerated, and nothing remains but some casks of grain alcohol.

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