Our roller girls can beat up your roller girls: Rocky Mountain Rollergirls, national champs

The Rocky Mountain Rollergirls' A-list traveling team 5280 Fight Club defeated the Charm City Rollergirls (Baltimore, MD), Gotham Girls Roller Derby (New York, NY) and the Oly Rollers (Olympia, WA) on their way to winning the Women's Flat Track Derby Association's national championships and the Hydra Trophy this weekend in Chicago.

RMRG eked out a 147-146 win in the thrilling championship bout, a rematch with the Oly Rollers (the team they defeated last month for the WFTDA West Region championships). And now that we've established that our rollergirls can beat up your rollergirls, we'd like to take this opportunity to present the Top five Rocky Mountain Rollergirls who can kick your ass:

View the full slideshow from the championships in Chicago.

1. DeRanged, #27. DeRanged is a jammer and blocker who skates for the Sugar Kill Gang on the home front and helped lead the 5280 Fight Club to victory, scoring 52 points in the finals bout against the Oly Rollers, more than any other individual jammer on the team. She was also on the 5280 Club team that skated to fourth place at the WFTDA Nationals in 2009, and she'll likely be there again in 2011. "DeRanged is just an amazing athlete all the way to her bones," says RMRG spokeswoman Dangerous Leigh A'zon. "She's a lifelong skater and has a drive to win that I've never seen in another human being. We were talking about it in the stands in those final seconds: Even with the score getting the way it was, we knew we still had sixteen more seconds, and we were just waiting to see how she would get it done this time." 2. Frida Beater, #18-3-202. Beater, a former speed skater and rugby player -- the perfect roller derby combo -- and co-captain of the 5280 Fight Club, scored 51 points against Oly in the finals bout as a jammer, including the very-last-second points that helped dramatically seal the deal in the final power jam. She's been competing since 2006 and skates for the Sugar Kill Gang when she's not on the road with 5280 Fight Club. "Frida Beater is an incredibly smart player," says Leigh A'zon. "Along with having the ability to do what she does, she understands the intricacies of the game better than anyone else. She knew exactly what was happening every second of that last jam, and when she knew she had that last point, she called it off, like, 'We won. it's over.' I think she knew before any of us did." 3. Amanda Jamitinya, #9. Jamitinya jammed it into plenty of her competitors this weekend and throughout the 2010 WFTDA season, and she racked up minor penalties against Oly to prove she deserves what has to be one of the least subtle noms du derby in the WFTDA. She was on the rink in the final jam yesterday and helped shut down Oly Rollers jammer Tannibal Lecter to secure the win. "I think people just aren't ready for what she's going to do to them," says Leigh A'zon. "She can control another player to the point where they're frustrated at the realization that they've lost control of their own bodies." Jamitinya recently moved to Denver, transferring from the Duke City Derby team in Albequerque, NM.

4. Psycho Babble. Psycho Babble fouled out in the second half of the finals bout and was a leader throughout the team's battle through the brackets, and she's not one to mess with: She's a bludgeoning blocker for both the 5280 Fight Club and the Red Riding Hoods, and sports Joker-style makeup to go with her moniker and her reputation as a hard hitter. "Psycho and DeRanged are sisters, and they definitely have some kind of crazy groupthink going on," says Leigh A'zon. "They both grew up on skates, and when the sisters are out there together, it's probably best to just avoid them altogether. It takes seven penalties throughout the game to foul out, but it's not necessarily a bad thing as long as you do it near the end of the game."

5. Urrk'n Jerk'n As Booty Blockya, #00. Last but not least (and the Rocky Mountain Rollergirls skater most likely to actually kick your ass if it needs kicking) is Urrk'n Jerk'n, a new recruit from Fort Collins's FoCo Girls Gone Derby. Another former speed skater, Urrk'n Jerk'n played tough at Nationals, fouling out in the finals bout: The booty does indeed block ya, evidently. "She's agility personified," says Leigh A'zon. "A team can build a wall against her and she gets through them like she's going through a wormhole. It's like she sees these gaps that nobody else sees. It's unbelievable to watch her."

For a sneak peek at some other rising ass-kickers, don't miss the Rocky Mountain Rollergirls' B-team, The Contenders, vs. the Denver Roller Dolls' Bruising Altitude at the Bladium (2400 Central Park Boulevard in Stapleton) on November 20.

KEEP WESTWORD FREE... Since we started Westword, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Denver, and we'd like to keep it that way. With local media under siege, it's more important than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" program, allowing us to keep offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food and culture with no paywalls.
Colin Bane
Contact: Colin Bane