Comedy

Resolutions for 2013: I promise to stop being a dick and shut up about Belle & Sebastian

New Year's resolutions are typically useless; they're often way too ambitious and usually forgotten by February. But there's value in the ritual of taking stock of the past year and making goals for the year to come.

When I was asked about my resolutions, I said couldn't think of a thing I'd like to change about myself. And anyone who could make that arrogant statement probably has a thing or two about their personality that could use some tweaking. So in the great literary tradition of self-loathing, I hereby proclaim that I will: stop marinating in my own hatred for cars while riding my bike; stop insisting that every person on earth listen to Belle & Sebastian; stop defining my self-worth through social media; and stop being a dick to people who genuinely care about politics.

See also: Your vote doesn't matter: Why there are better things to do on election day To tip, or not to tip? That's up for debate Giving thanks for a few of our favorite albums

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Josiah M. Hesse
Contact: Josiah M. Hesse