Man, it's a good thing "the only one of us that's closest to a nurse" was there, whatever that means, because this chick slaps into the beach like a wet sack of baloney. She folds like a spent paper boat in a rainstorm. I'm saying she lands that trick with the grace of an airborne ham. She eases into that shoreline like a submarine made out of discarded limbs.
Alright, we're stretching this one, but there is a moral to this story: Jk there is no moral to this story. Maybe aim for the dude with the yellow pail? His pecs look like an excellent cushion.