Santa Poo: Christmas just got shittier

Keep Westword Free
I Support
  • Local
  • Community
  • Journalism
  • logo

Support the independent voice of Denver and help keep the future of Westword free.

Halloween is almost here, and you know what that means: that Christmas is also almost here -- or at least close enough for the most ambitious retailers to start monkey-flinging porducts at us like so much feces. It's just that, with most retailers, the products they're chucking at us don't actually involve feces. In a move that ensures a bright future for our dual American obsessions with hygiene and buying shit, however, all that's changing, with a product that is actually called "Santa Poo." For real.

We could tell you all about it, but nothing we could say could possibly compare to the mind-boggling inanity of this early-season press release that appeared in our inbox yesterday:

Looking for a different kind of stocking stuffer?

We are all looking for the perfect gift for the holiday season that will be a real conversation starter, right? Well what about a room deodorant straight from Santa's sleigh. I would love to send along samples of Santa~Poo by Poo~Pourri for any last minute gift guides you might be working on.

Poo~Pourri's formula of essential oils such as a fresh evergreen and holly scents should be sprayed into the toilet water before you go and no one else will ever know. A couple of drops of this spray creates a film along the water's surface that traps odor at its source. This solution to embarrassing bathroom emergencies is also safe for the planet.

Start writing up those wish-lists now, kids. It's shaping up to be a magical holiday season.

Keep Westword Free... Since we started Westword, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Denver, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Denver with no paywalls.

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.


Join the Westword community and help support independent local journalism in Denver.


Join the Westword community and help support independent local journalism in Denver.