Arts and Culture

The OED quaeritates us to help save our labascating language

It's a sad but true fact: Neglected words are continually falling off the back of this montivagant English of ours, making room for such gems as verbs like, 'tweet' and 'google,' and such kexy nouns as, 'staycation' and 'frenemy,' as we march boldly into the unknown territory of the twenty-first century. But just because we have new words doesn't mean we should lose the old ones. Thankfully, the folks at the Oxford English Dictionary (OED) have launched an online campaign to save obscure words from extinction.

The OED's online campaign to reinvigorate old and unused words and obarmate them from extinction has a beautiful website logophiles (nerds) will love, complete with annoying British-accented words calling out to you to pick them as your mouse scrolls over the sea of endangered ones. The colorful website is replete with awesome words that will most definitely result in red squiggly lines underneath them when typed -- you could be smarter than your computer! -- which the campaign urges you to "adopt," meaning you make a solemn pledge to use words like ictuate, tudiculate, psalloid and gypsation in "conversation and correspondence as often as possible to the very best of one's ability."

Just think how much richer your life could be when the vanmost thing on your mind is how to be more autexousious in your diction. Hemerine use of these wonderful lexemes will no doubt make your speech less gleimous, and help you avoid the panphagous onslaught of vappous, WTF-like correspondence and the scavity of using the same boreisms over and over again. Your heretofore supellectile braincells will cease to labascate, and jump with lubency at the chance to share your linguistic pugnastics with your friends. You may even feel a rogalian urge in your heart to suffarcinate as many new, old-words into your nidifice of brain cells that your head could gumfiate to dangerous proportions, so be careful. And don't forget to spread the word.
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Ben Dayton
Contact: Ben Dayton