To Hell With Hallmark

The Kill Cupid III Valentine's Show, taking place tonight at 9:30 p.m. at the Oriental Theater, 4335 West 44th Avenue, is much like a typical romance: There's mood music, a bit of eye candy, a helping of T&A, and before it's all over, somebody's heart gets mangled. But the heart in question will belong to a dead cow, and the mangling will unfold in front of a live audience.

"We don't want red and pink streamers and candy hearts on tables," says Colby Bemis — who along with Tyler Hayden is presenting the multimedia show under the auspices of their Polarity Twins production company. "It's an alternative for people who don't support it being a Hallmark holiday."

That's why the models in Kill Cupid's theatrical fashion show, which showcases the work of local designers Damaris, Potential Fashions and Aki Getsu, will feature broken arrows in their hair, courtesy of stylists Taylor McFadden and Amanda Anderson. Visual art by the Magnet Mafia and dBom and burlesque performances by Ooh-La-La! Presents will be accompanied by less-than-amorous tunes from bands Red Cloud West and Reverend Deadeye, along with DJ sets by the Postman. And local artist Damaris Drummond will use a special Valentine's Day medium for her live performance art: bloody cow hearts. How romantic.

The 21+ event costs $10 in advance and $12 the day of the show; doors open at 9 p.m. For more information, call 303-455-2124 or go to www.theorientaltheater.com.
Fri., Feb. 9, 9:30 p.m.

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Joel Warner is a former staff writer for Westword and International Business Times. He's also written for WIRED, Men's Journal, Men's Health, Bloomberg Businessweek, Popular Science, Slate, Grantland and many other publications. He's co-author of the 2014 book The Humor Code: A Global Search for What Makes Things Funny, published by Simon & Schuster.
Contact: Joel Warner