Two words for you, pal: jazz club. Such spots are custom-made for big breakup scenes, and Dazzle -- with its long, deep booths, chic crowds and high-volume background noise -- is perfect for giving the ex-love of your life the big "goodbye and good luck" speech. Walk right in, order a couple stiff shots of liquid courage and get on with it. Don't be a shlub. Don't give her any of that "It's not you, it's me" crap. Just tell her: "It's you and we're done," take the obligatory drink in the face with some élan, then sit back and try to look crestfallen and vulnerable while she stomps out the door and out of your life. With a live band on the stage, no one will have heard you tell her why
it was over, and if you're lucky, Ms. (or Mr.) Right Now will feel so sorry for you sitting there alone that he or she will help nurse your wounds with a few top-shelf martinis. If things go well, you can retire to the comfortable (and slightly quieter) lounge for a late-night nibble.