Here at Schmuck of the Week HQ, we've reported about a lot of schmucky behavior over the years. But seldom have we encountered schmuckiness on the scale linked to Paul Donovan Johnson, a child predator with a Colorado conviction, while allegedly harassing a Japanese tourist and her pre-school-age daughter in San Francisco this week.
The story comes to us from the San Francisco Examiner (owned by Denver gazillionaire Phil Anschutz), which reports that on Wednesday, the woman and her daughter left their hotel in the city's Tenderloin district at about 3 p.m. when Johnson began taunting them -- for five blocks. He's said to have yelled at them angrily and chased after them when they attempted to run away.
In an attempt to ditch this creepazoid once and for all, the woman and child ducked into a market, whose owner and his seventeen-year-old son let them hide in a back room. Johnson, who was convicted in Colorado of lewd acts with a child under the age of fifteen and is currently on parole in Cali over a resisting-arrest beef, followed them inside, but gave up his pursuit after the owner confronted him and made it clear the cops were on the way.
Outside the market, however, he reportedly unzipped his fly, shook his Little Johnson at the men and declared, "Oh, you can have the girl" before adding, "She's the one who's seducing me by squatting in her inappropriate clothes."
The child's outfit? A dress that reached her ankles.
At that point, Johnson split. But the shopkeeper's son followed him and flagged down some cops, who took him into custody.
Good news, but not as good as it might be. According to the Examiner, Johnson has only been charged with a single misdemeanor count of indecent exposure -- a crime that can net him a maximum of just six months in jail despite his sex offense in Colorado. That's because California law only allows him to be charged with a felony if he'd previously been busted for indecent exposure in the state, and this week was apparently the first time he's been charged with whipping it out there.
Now that's inappropriate. Here's a larger look at one of Johnson's many mug shots.
More from our Schmuck of the Week archive: "Glenn DeCarlo, alleged schmuck, tries to shoot housemate, instead hits son -- twice."