Stuff it: Okay, it's official. Westword has become the hardest-hitting, in-your-face reporting magazine on the face of the planet.
I mean, who could possibly disagree? With cover stories as hard-hitting as Adam Cayton-Holland's "Word of Mouth," in the January 27 issue, we can be sure Westword is dedicating all its resources to making sure Denverites are well informed about the dark underbelly of society.
I am also thrilled that this is the second article about burritos to grace the cover of Westword in the past year. It is difficult to overcompensate for the lack of good burrito coverage we've had in recent years, and Westword's efforts to compensate warm my heart, all wrapped up in a warm tortilla and smothered with chile. What is wrong with you people?
There are wonderful and horrible things happening in Denver right now. I truly don't care if the burrito lady can sell to Wellington Webb but can't seem to break the seal with Hickenlooper.
This story was sort of like a printed version of what every news channel in Denver does at the end of its broadcast -- you know, where they have to end with the dumbest story of the night, about a five-year-old boy who is selling newspapers for charity? Or the kids who all give the stupid thumbs-up sign?
Westword, we all know you're not that soft; that's why we read your usually wonderful paper. Please don't give us the Channel 4 sendoff -- we can stay up till 10:28 if we really want that.
Stay off the sauce: I have always been grateful for the burrito people who come to my office. On some mornings, my bacon, egg and cheese burrito -- with a big dose of hot sauce -- is the only thing that keeps me going. I didn't realize how lucky I am to live in Denver, where hangover cures come to my door!
Thanks to Adam Cayton-Holland for a great story. I like What's So Funny, too, but I can't read it when I'm hung over, because my head hurts when I laugh.
Blowhard job: Regarding Michael Roberts's "Dan's Plan," in the February 3 issue:
If Dan Caplis can pretend to be a legitimate radio talk-show host, why can't Ward Churchill pretend to be an authority on Indians? As far as I'm concerned, they're both blowhard poseurs.
Lefty turn: The idea that Mr. Caplis grew up under the roof with a cop who was a lefty is so absurd to believe. If you were anything but a Democrat in Chicago, you didn't work. He knows that. Since when are law-and-order guys liberal? Coupled with the fact that Caplis is a hard-nosed Catholic with the views of Attila the Hun. Give me some wiggle room.
P.S.: Aimee Sporer and Dan Caplis would have trouble getting out of town on Colfax with a map.
Shoot to chill: The beauty of freedom of speech is that it allows wackos on both sides of the political fence to publicly voice their "outrageous and insupportable" views, as Governor Owens calls them. That is the essence of the freedom, democracy and liberty that President Bush states the U.S. wishes to spread around the world. If we feel that Ward Churchill should be fired, then Lieutenant General James Mattis should also be fired for his inflammatory remark that "it's fun to shoot people."
Maybe the Marines could use that in their next recruitment commercial.
Space case: David Holthouse's "Building a Better Mousetrap," published in the January 20 Westword, misses the mark. The real story is that the Front Range is in a losing battle as far as intact wildlife habitat is concerned. We are witness to shopping centers, houses, hotels and streets being built on top of the last remaining bits of open space. The open space that isn't slated for development is often converted into green-grass parks and playing fields instead of left as a wild island in the urban landscape. The real story is about the balance of wildlife for its own sake, losing to human encroachment.
Protecting the Preble's jumping mouse isn't impossible. All that is necessary is for development to avoid streams and wetlands. Taking such measures would also mean better developments, cleaner water and a little more of the prairie intact. Instead, the case seems to be developers salivating at the chance to build in any open place. One of the casualties of this trend in plowing land under for concrete is the Preble's mouse. I want there to be places for my children's children to have the option of finding intrigue and inspiration on the prairie, and in the small forgotten creatures like a rare mouse that took eons to fill the niche that it occupies.