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The celebrity-starved Denver media is all Twitterpated during the DNC

Good grief, man! Can you believe the amount of star-fucking going on in this town right now? Seriously, it's pathetic. Are we really so celebrity-starved that all it takes is some barely-worth-mentioning B-lister to get us frothing at the mouth?

Actually, I shouldn't say us. I honestly can't say that I've heard any regular folks going on about who they've seen where — rather, it's the recently Twitter-happy members of our local press.

Such and such is jamming a ham sandwich into his face at blah, blah, blah...

Dumb squared, right?

Listen, I'll be the first to admit that I get a little wide-eyed in the presence of somebody I admire. Just last week I was awed to find myself sitting across from Jason Isbell on the Larimer Lounge patio before his show, talking about his new record and recording at Muscle Shoals. The difference, though, is that I engaged the guy as a person rather than just gawking at him.

I just don't get the whole voyeuristic, celebrity-obsessed nature of our culture, which, of course, is perpetuated by the mainstream media. And the blogosphere is built on this shit. I'm constantly dumbfounded that sites like TMZ and folks such as Perez Hilton exist, much less thrive. To watch an army of second-stringers get in on the action — let's just thank God it will be over in a day or two.

All the same, as mind-numbingly inane as most Twitter feeds have been, there have been a few that were illuminating. For instance, this one from the Denver Post.

Rock the vote has a bunch of no shows. Attendees with balcony seats asked to move to lower section to fill auditorium.

Rock the Vote, a bunch of no-shows? Really? This was supposed to be the hottest ticket in town — at least, that's the impression we got from the Rock the Vote flacks, who made it seem like the joint would be crammed elbows to a-holes with important people. And we weren't supposed to be among them. Because this same organization stonewalled us when we requested credentials a few weeks ago — presumably in favor of hooking up our Twitterpated counterparts at the dailies — with this note:

Thanks for your interest in covering Rock the Vote's Ballot Bash event at the Democratic National Convention.

We received an overwhelming response from media wanting to cover Ballot Bash and would have liked to accommodate everyone, but this is a seated event and unfortunately we have limited capacity and won't be able to credential you for this event. If we have cancellations or changes we will be sure to let you know, and you can always come by and double check on the night of the event.

Despite getting the Heisman by Rock the Vote, we managed to weasel our way into the Ballot Bash anyway. And just for fun, we dispatched one of our writers to crash as many parties as possible, starting with that one (read about his exploits on our Backbeat Online blog). And I won't deny that I found it a bit gratifying to hear that the organizers had to shuffle people around to make the venue seem filled. Someone within the Rock the Vote organization clearly had an overinflated sense of value regarding this show. After all, we're talking about a bill consisting of Fall Out Boy, N.E.R.D. and Jakob Dylan, for chrissakes, not tickets to Obama's acceptance speech.

Besides, isn't the impetus for Rock the Vote getting young people registered to vote? And if so, why were the only peeps invited to this shindig fat cats willing to shell out between $10,000 and $250,000? (I know, I know, it was a fundraiser.) What a wasted opportunity. Here we are, smack dab in the middle of the most high-profile political event this town will ever see — presaging perhaps the most noteworthy election of our lifetime — and Rock the Vote chooses to host a fundraiser rather than reach out to young, voter-age kids who are presumably captivated by the DNC, the process, the protests and all the coverage?

Whatever. I'm just glad this whole thing will be over soon. As stoked as I am to see Denver take its place in history, I can't wait for all the pundits and beautiful people to hit the bricks so we can get our town back.

Twitter that.