Love is a many splendored thing. Sure. But there's a flip side to that coin. It's also a very complicated thing. A very taxing, laborious and often tedious thing. Not to mention, a frustrating, depressing, tumultuous, inexplicable thing. It's been often said that it's better to have love than to have lost. Someone on the losing side of love wrote that to talk themselves off the ledge, we imagine, as they were on the business end of a heartrending three-day bender.
If only Sade, a impossibly sultry siren whose built an entire career upon rhapsodizing and ruminating on love, had been around when that phrase was coined. If only that lonesome loser had a chance to bask in her seemingly endless wellspring of proverbial wisdom regarding all things love, then that adage would've probably ended emphatically with a period after it's better to have loved. Completely different sentiment, yes? Luckily, unlike that poor sap, we've had years to absorb her cunning insight, and here's five things we've learned.
01. "It's All About Our Love"
The title kind of gives it all way, the secret to a long lasting, eternally fulfilling love. But can it really all be so simple? Evidently, so. To make love last and grow, you must know first and foremost that it really is all about our love. "Darling, we know it," she sings. "Whatever may come, we can get through it/As if it's just begun." Indeed. Thanks for the reminder Sade!
02. "Hang On to Your Love"
"In heaven's name why are you walking away?" she pleads before exhorting us to, "Hang on to your love." And her sage wisdom doesn't end there. After wondering why we play these games, she once again admonishes us to hang on to our love, while encouraging us to "Be brave when the journey is rough." It's not easy when you're in love, she acknowledges. It's not easy, Sade. Thanks for your words of encouragement. We won't give up.
03. "I Will Be Your Friend"
If you took a straw poll of everbody who's ever had a successful, longterm relationship, it's likely that you'll find that friendship is the foundation of the relationship. So when she promises that "I will be your friend until the end of time," those aren't hollow words. "The punches to your heart melt away when you never thought they'd heal/So trust in me." Our sentiments exactly.
04. "It's Only Love That Gets You Through"
The punches to your heart she speaks of in "I Will Be Your Friend" -- how do you think those heal? Exactly. By "forgiving those who have trespassed against you," as she puts it, paraphrasing the bible. "And you know tenderness comes from pain," she adds, before going back to the good book, specifically Corinthians 13. "And love is kind and love can give/And love needs no gain."
"05. Soldier of Love"
In "Soldier of Love," Sade boils everything down succinctly: Not only is it about our love, but when -- despite your most valiant efforts -- that love disappears, it's about perserverance. After all, at the end of the day, we're all soldiers of love, no? "I've lost the use of my heart/But I'm still alive/Still looking for the life/The endless pool on the other side/It's a wild wild west/I'm doing my best." Ultimately, that's all you can do. Love is a battlefield (we picked that up from Pat Benetar).