Conspiracy Theories

In their Crocktober explanation of the World Series ticket nightmare, the new Colorado Rockies – or at least their managers – sounded a lot like the old Colorado Rockies, bumbling through the suggestion that the mess was created by “an external and malicious attack.”

We haven’t heard such a crock since Hillary Rodham Clinton blamed a “vast, right-wing conspiracy” for the rumors that her husband, President Bill Clinton, might be fooling around a little. But Candidate Hillary sounded a little more grounded in the blast voice-mails she left around town this past weekend, urging people to join her at a rally at the Auraria campus this afternoon, featuring Big Head Todd and the MONSTERS, a band that we’re pretty sure she hadn’t listened to before, judging by the way she said the name…--Patricia Calhoun