Southwest Airline skating rink security enhancements: Kenny Be's Worst-Case Scenario

The enhanced security screenings at DIA provide an excellent opportunity for Coloradans to get used to more aggressive pat-downs. Should state Republicans get their wish, searches to prove citizenship would start tomorrow. As citizens withdraw more into their cyber-selves, they'll welcome the protracted crotch caress as Uncle Sam's handshake of promise. Expect agents to appear wherever crowds are gathering for holiday fun... With corporate sponsorship comes the need of enhanced security screenings for ice skaters at Southwest Airlines' ice skating rink at Skyline Park.

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