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Freaky Friday: "You're So Precious" - Folerio

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Our weekly voyage into the sheer WTFuckery of the web delivers us to the insufferable presence of Folerio. This pencil-mustached, bewigged hipster paragon apparently has a real, honest-to-god record deal, a fact that makes me want to hit myself in the face with a shovel. And you'll want to hit yourself (or him, perhaps) with a shovel, too, once you hear the rinky-dink, "can't be bothered to even fake it" musical backing and awkward, annoying spoken-word performance, see the incredibly creepy (even if it is supposed to be ironic -- I mean, that is supposed to be ironic, right?), stalkerish, video love letter to the teenaged Alyssa Milano and realize that, yes, Western civilization has come to an end, when this kind of crap is created and perpetuated not by deranged amateurs desperately unaware of their own lack of talent, but as a commercial offering by a deranged hipster desperate for ... attention? a supplement to his trust fund? the validation that comes from pulling off a prank that allows you to release this on an actual record label? In any case, the video awaits you after the jump.

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Join the Westword community and help support independent local journalism in Denver.