Ten Things No One From Denver Ever Says

There are certain things people from Denver say all the time -- like, for instance, "This is the best city in the country, but please stop telling everyone!" What about things you'll never hear someone from Denver say? Here's our top ten. See also: Twenty Reasons Why Denver Sucks and...

By Michael Roberts

September 9, 2014

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There are certain things people from Denver say all the time -- like, for instance, "This is the best city in the country, but please stop telling everyone!"

What about things you'll never hear someone from Denver say? Here's our top ten.

Number 10: There's nowhere around here to buy any marijuana. Number 9: Colorado Springs is really progressive. Continue to keep counting down our list of ten things no one from Denver ever says. Number 8 Everyone's so out of shape. Number 7: I'd rather have a PBR instead of a craft beer. Continue to keep counting down our list of ten things no one from Denver ever says. Number 6: The weather's so boring. Number 5: I wish I could find some decent Mexican food. Continue to keep counting down our list of ten things no one from Denver ever says. Number 4: People are too lazy to bike to work. Number 3: The scenery's overrated. Continue to keep counting down our list of ten things no one from Denver ever says. Number 2: I can't remember what teams people root for. Number 1: The air's too thin.

Send your story tips to the author, Michael Roberts.

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Michael Roberts began his career with Westword in 1990 as music editor. In 1999, he took on a new role, full-time media reporter, as author of a column called The Message. In 2008, he became the lead writer for Westword's news blog, The Latest Word, a position he held until January 2023. Michael continues to freelance for Westword, covering everything from business to sports and the media; he also contributes to Jazziz, a national music magazine. He holds a bachelor's degree from what is now Colorado Mesa University and master's degrees from the University of California, Los Angeles, and Northwestern University.

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