Today's featured events: Top o' the afternoon to ye! St. Patty's Day ain't over yet...

Unlike our own drunken managing editor at the Fainting Goat, have you been sticking to the straight and narrow, sitting in a cubicle all day, with nary a sip o' anything green or otherwise? You still have time to carouse before they mop up the St. Patty's Day mess, and here are a few places to do it:

At Scruffy Murphy's, 2030 Larimer Street, the party's been in full swing since Friday, but there should still be live music, a swaggering Pint-Man and a few comely Guinness Girls hangin' about this afternoon and evenin' (go to the Scruffy website or call 303-291-6992). And in Larimer Square, ye olde Comedy Works, 1226 15th Street, hosts a stand-up (and falling-down?) evening with Dr. Kevin Fitzgerald and His Lucky Charms, beginning at 8 p.m. Tickets are $12; get online or call 303-595-3637 to reserve yours.

At the very, very Irish Sam's No. 3, 2580 S. Havana Street, Aurora, they'll be celebrating with a St. Patrick's Day Fiesta, featuring live mariachi (very Irish!), plus balloon and caricature artists from 5 to 9 p.m. tonight, as well as traditional corned beef and cabbage with green beer, and not-so-traditional green burritos and green margaritas all day. Call 303-751-0347. Babes Around Denver will be offering drink specials to benefit the GLBT Center at Club M, Hamburger Mary's, 700 E. 17th Avenue. There's a $3 cover at the door; visit the BAD website or call 303-751-0347 for details. Drink specials also abound beginning at 4 p.m. at the Berkshire, 7352 E. 29th Avenue in Stapleton. Find them online or call 303-321-4010.

And finally, at O'Lannie's Clocktower Cabaret, 1601 Arapahoe Street, there'll be a wee bit o' the wearin' o' the green -- and little else -- when emcee Scooter McScooch and a bevy of burlesque girls present the St. Patty's Burlesque Bash, an all-Irish evening of live music, risqué dancers, comedy and more, beginning at 7:30 p.m. Admission is $10. Go to the Lannie's website or call 303-293-0075 -- or else you'll be green with envy.

For more ways to rock the night and kill the day, check out Westword's St. Patrick's event listings or bar and club listings.

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