Top thirteen insults to Colorado and America by Westboro Baptist Church's late Fred Phelps

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Number 13: Hackers on the hook

After WBC members proclaimed they would picket funerals of the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting victims in 2012, a group of hacktivists appropriately named "Anonymous" hit the WBC right in the hard drive by crashing the holy hell out of Westboro's website,, with a distributed denial of service (DDOS) attack (which in non-hacker terms means "your sh*t don't work -- mortgage your house and call Geek Squad). The unrepentant hackers stated that they will keep it up "until they are forced to put their inbred church tithes to use to pay for bandwidth." The same hackers also released a WBC member list, including personal contact information, and that move was certainly a violation of the church members' privacy.

But since picketing peoples' funerals is a particularly heinous violation of privacy, it's challenging to find anyone outside of the Westboro Baptist Church who cares.

Number 12: The motherf*cking Patriot Guard Riders

Everyone knows from the movies -- or real life if you are unlucky or stupid -- that screwing with a bunch of bikers is a bad idea. The Patriot Guard Riders (PGR) is an organization of motorcycle riders that attends funerals of police, firefighters and members of the armed forces, with permission; greets troops returning home; does volunteer work and helps protect grieving family members and friends at funerals that the WBC targets for protests. The PGR folks volunteer to put themselves, their bikes and their big, waving American flags between the funeral-goers and the WBC, shielding the funeral guests and drowning out the hateful bleating of the Westboros with patriotic songs -- and revving engines.

The PGR deserves some sort of award for "Most Amazing and Frequent Ownage of Westboro Baptist Church," preferably in trophy form: a statuette with a motorcycle running over a likeness of WBC's PR person, Shirley Phelps-Roper, Fred's disgusting daughter.

Continue to keep counting down the top thirteen insults to Colorado and America by Westboro Baptist Church's late Fred Phelps.
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Michael Roberts has written for Westword since October 1990, serving stints as music editor and media columnist. He currently covers everything from breaking news and politics to sports and stories that defy categorization.
Contact: Michael Roberts