Schmuck of the Week

Tyler Konecne and His Identity Were Hidden From Everyone But the Police Dog

The expression on Tyler Konecne's face in his mug shot (a full-size version is on view below) suggests that he thinks of himself as a badass -- but dumbass is more like it. Not only did he get stuck in a business' ceiling during an alleged burglary try, but when he came down in an apparent attempt to escape, he was bitten by a police dog. And while he initially succeeded in fooling the cops about his identity (the probable cause affidavit on view below refers to him by another name for most of its length), the truth was only a fingerprint away.

See also: Trina Chavez-Hutchins's Allegedly Schmucky Plan to Get Her Grandkids to Help Shoplift

At about 8:46 a.m. on August 11, according to the police report, officers were dispatched on a burglary call to Town and Country Real Estate, located at 3734 Astrozon Boulevard in a Colorado Springs strip mall.

Turns out nothing had been stolen from the office, but plenty of items had been damaged owing to the scofflaw's entry method. The statement reveals that he entered an air duct and cut a hole approximately eighteen-to-twenty inches in diameter in order to enter the ceiling, then broke through some tiles to gain access to the space below. There, he ripped out an alarm panel.

Because the doors remained bolted and there were no broken windows, the officer on the scene guessed the suspect was still on site, and he was right. When he checked the bathroom, he eyeballed a backpack loaded with assorted tools and observed "rapid movement above the insulation." So he ordered the occupant to come down -- which he didn't choose to do.

At that point, KRDO-TV reports that a perimeter was established around the building, numerous employees were evacuated from neighboring businesses and the SWAT team was called to the scene. Members hung around until about 2 p.m., when the man finally emerged from his hiding place, just in time to be bitten by a police dog. The wound was reportedly serious enough to require medical treatment.

During the arrest, cops found a driver's license and Social Security card belonging to one James David McDow -- hence the use of the name "McDow" through the majority of the report.

But McDow he wasn't. After his fingerprints were checked, he was positively identified as Tyler Konecne, Schmuck of the Week.

Okay, the cops didn't add that last part. We did.

Look below to see Konecne's double mug shot, followed by the probable cause affidavit.

Tyler Konecne Probable Cause Affidavit

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