Comic Ralphie May on why DIA sucks

So you thought the only thing scary about Denver International Airport was the blue Mustang of death? Not so, argues comedian Ralphie May. For him, the sheer size of the place is much more daunting. In a recent bit posted online at ComedyCentral.com, the large-and-in-charge yukster rails against the long...

By Michael Roberts

June 30, 2009

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So you thought the only thing scary about Denver International Airport was the blue Mustang of death? Not so, argues comedian Ralphie May. For him, the sheer size of the place is much more daunting. In a recent bit posted online at ComedyCentral.com, the large-and-in-charge yukster rails against the long walks from one place to the other, which are made more difficult by the slip-on shoes he tends to wear while flying to make security checks go faster. Soon, he's sufficiently winded to make a political incorrect plea: "Hey! Black man on the golf cart!" Lucky thing he caught a ride. In his words, "They picked me up at gate 88. Gate 31? Kansas state line."

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Ralphie May - Denver Airport

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Michael Roberts began his career with Westword in 1990 as music editor. In 1999, he took on a new role, full-time media reporter, as author of a column called The Message. In 2008, he became the lead writer for Westword's news blog, The Latest Word, a position he held until January 2023. Michael continues to freelance for Westword, covering everything from business to sports and the media; he also contributes to Jazziz, a national music magazine. He holds a bachelor's degree from what is now Colorado Mesa University and master's degrees from the University of California, Los Angeles, and Northwestern University.

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