We recruited sandwich connoisseur Jonathan Shikes to help with the tasting. The bean twins really look identical, so we had no way to control who got what flavor, though it somehow went a lot like this:
Candy Girls: Mmm, plum!
JS: What is this? Some kind of spice?
CG: I got banana.
JS: This...is not banana.
CG: Coconut here.
JS: It's like an oil. A horrible oil. What am I eating?!
We did manage to get through a few of the interesting flavored beans, though for the most part they hit the trash can as soon as it became clear we had moldy cheese candy in our mouths. The weird flavors are disturbingly authentic.
This is a strange concept for a candy, because you're really only enjoying it a fraction of the time. Even when you luck out with a delicious flavor, you're so tense from anticipating whether it will be vile or not that you miss much of your chance to savor the jelly bean. The rest of the time, you're daring yourself to finish what's in your mouth or spitting it out.
Truly, the most entertaining part of this candy is coercing someone else into eating it. And therein lies the heart of Bean Boozled. It's not something to be bought and enjoyed alone or, god forbid, in a dark movie theater, but it's loads of fun to impose the disgusting things onto an unsuspecting taster.
Would we eat the whole box? That would take an enormous reserve of nerves.
Would we purchase again? Perhaps as a party game, which seems like the best use for this candy.
Rating: 3 out of 5
Keep Westword Free... Since we started Westword, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Denver, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Denver with no paywalls.