Cafe Society

Candy Girls: Strawberry Milkshake Whoppers

Can a candy with a malted center ever really be milkshake-flavored? Wouldn't it automatically be malt-flavored? This obviously isn't a question the marketing people at Hershey's worried themselves over, and it certainly didn't stop us from picking up a giant pink pack of the candies when we spied them in a dollar bin at Walgreens. Doesn't all the best candy come out of the dollar bin? And by "best" we mean "weird and probably recalled."

First reactions: The balls are very light pink, almost white. We expected a more PINK! pink. The scent is almost overpowering.

Liz: They smell like Barbie. Aubrey: No, like the Strawberry Shortcake dolls! Liz: Oh yeah, totally.

Taste: The coating is waxy and softer than your average Whopper. Our tongues are immediately bombed with an intense fake-strawberry flavor that should be disgusting, but actually evokes some nostalgia.

Aubrey: This is the exact same flavor of a McDonald's strawberry milkshake. Liz: They taste pink. Aubrey: It's not bad, just exactly like every artificial strawberry flavored thing you've ever had. Liz: Really pink.

Conclusions: Would we finish the box? No. Would we purchase this candy again? No. Would we make Steve the receptionist eat one without disclosing what it was, only to find out he loathes Whoppers? Yes. Rating: 2 out of 5

- Liz and Aubrey

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Aubrey Shoe
Contact: Aubrey Shoe