This year's hottest gift: My First Bacon, a huggable talking slab of meat

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"What child on this planet wouldn't want to befriend a piece of mostly meat held together with fat and love?" asks ThinkGeek, the affable producer of all kinds of geeky wares.

Mario Batali jokes notwithstanding, we have the same question. Who WOULDN'T love that? That's why ThinkGeek created My First Bacon, an adorable, fuzzy hunk of meat that says, "I'm bacon!" when squeezed. And yes, it's actually available for purchase.

ThinkGeek designed the stuffed strip as an April Fools' Day joke and brought it to life at the request of several customers. Now the company is releasing it just in time for the holiday season.

We're normally against toys that make noise when shopping for the Fraggles in our families, but we'll make an exception for the cuddly, stuffed pork product with an important lesson to teach. Raising kids with discriminating palates is tough, after all, and we'll take all the help we can get. As ThinkGeek says, My First Bacon shares the message "You've got a friend in meat." That's a good first nugget in the body of food wisdom we'll eventually bestow on Junior. Plus, it could subliminally ensure that the little guy will never go to the dark side, condemning the consumption of animal protein and becoming a militant vegan.

And just in case anyone was looking for gift ideas for us, we kind of want one for ourselves.

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Join the Westword community and help support independent local journalism in Denver.


Join the Westword community and help support independent local journalism in Denver.