Brief Jerky: Edible underwear we can really sink our teeth into

Gluttons we might be, but we're not exactly turned on by the notion of picking candy -- or, worse yet, melted fruit roll-up goo -- out of our private parts, so we've never been partial to edible underwear. But now we've learned that some creative genius has invented a type...

By Laura Shunk

February 21, 2012

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Gluttons we might be, but we're not exactly turned on by the notion of picking candy -- or, worse yet, melted fruit roll-up goo -- out of our private parts, so we've never been partial to edible underwear. But now we've learned that some creative genius has invented a type of consumable lingerie that we can really sink our teeth into.

We're talking about unmentionables made of meat, which come in several varieties:

The bacon bra... ...and matching underpants! Probably should fry that up before consuming it. Prosciutto panties. Because nothing says sexy like salty, sticky, see-through undergarments that eliminate the need for cooking. This jazzed-up meat package (pun intended) can be yours for the low, low price of $15. Or make your own, following the instructions for crafting these bad boys. And might we suggest appropriately named local products like Perky Jerky or Climax Jerky as possible material for more meaty embellishments to your finished britches?

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Laura Shunk was Westword's restaurant critic from 2010 to 2012; she's also been food editor at the Village Voice and a dining columnist in Beijing. Her toughest assignment had her drinking ten martinis and eating ten Caesar salads over the course of 48 hours. She still drinks martinis, but remains lukewarm on Caesar salads.

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