4

Twin Peaks, my favorite restaurant discovery of 2011: Breasts and thighs, oh my!

^
Keep Westword Free
I Support
  • Local
  • Community
  • Journalism
  • logo

Support the independent voice of Denver and help keep the future of Westword free.

As the year draws to a close, I look back fondly at the breast, er, best restaurant that I had the pleasure of visiting in 2011.

Twin Peaks opened last month just outside of Colorado Mills, and it's a worthy adversary to Denver's already established breastaurants, Hooters and Tilted Kilt. All three emphasize the largesse of a woman's up-front features, but Twin Peaks towers above the other two.

As you walk through the entrance, you're welcomed by the smiling face of a hostess smartly dressed in very short khaki shorts and a lumberjack shirt that's been stripped down to the bare essentials. But you're not there just for a fashion show; you're there for the full festivities.

I got walked to the bar -- which is huge -- and was greeted right away by a lovely lumber-lass who explained to me that they have two sizes of draft: girl and MAN. Of course, my choice was the big one -- gotta make up for a deficiency somehow. The beer was so cold, it actually had ice crystals, which is the chain's other main claim to fame. It's served at a numbing 29 degrees, a fact prominently displayed on a big LED sign behind the bar. This beer was probably the best I'd had all year because it was also the coldest, and it hit my belly faster than Santa with jelly.

The sight of the servers hit a little lower. I kept my hands on my glass and my eyes above see level, and tried desperately not to Peak.

Keep Westword Free... Since we started Westword, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Denver, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Denver with no paywalls.

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.

 

Join the Westword community and help support independent local journalism in Denver.

 

Join the Westword community and help support independent local journalism in Denver.