Politics

Delegating Denver #50 of 56: Vermont

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Vermont

Total Number of Delegates: 23 Pledged: 15 Unpledged: 8

How to Recognize a Vermont Delegate: Vermont has a reputation as a haven for hippies and trust-funders, but loaded wannabes are only fooling themselves if they think they can be a Green Mountaineer simply by relocating and becoming a hobby farm-uh. True Vermonters are more rare than a warm welcome in a Northeast Kingdom ski town. But don't call these independent individuals unfriendly: They’re just too busy fighting off McMansions and Wal-Marts to befriend idiot transplants in search of a fictitious Utopia. Life in Vermont has always been about hard work (well, at least from 5 a.m. until breakfast). Vermonters are the Americans to call when cows need to be milked, equal rights defended, wars won and mountains moved. They are the selfless servants who keep their noses to the grindstone in order to accomplish the miracles that others take credit for. They'd rather make a better world than muck around in other people's bullshit, damn ya! Of course, that kind of attitude means they don't spend a lot of time glad-handing, and will stick out at the Democratic Convention like social sore thumbs. Mostly, they’ll keep to themselves until provoked, and then they’ll talk too loudly and laugh at the wrong parts of a conversation. While their arms flail, their eyes will dart wildly in search of the exits. Remember the “Dean Scream”? Aiyah, ’nuff said! Vermonters will be the delegates who are all dolled up in their dress dungarees, handmade sweaters and rubberized loafers. Males will wear plaid wool hats with the earflaps down and have a tendency to slowly drift toward the dooryard. Females will settle comfortably into any situation, then take out their knitting and get to work on the pieces they need to sell (in craft co-ops from Bennington to Burlington) to pay for the winter's heating oil.

Famous Vermonters: 21st United States president Chester A. Arthur; 30th United States president Calvin Coolidge; original apostles of the Mormon Church Joseph Smith, Brigham Young and Heber C. Kimball; Seventh-Day Adventist Church founder Rachel Oakes Preston; Panama Canal engineer Lindon Wallace Bates; Spanish-American War hero Admiral George Dewey; tractor-happy John Deere; dental laughing-gas pioneer Gardner Quincy Colton; rodeo jeans inventor Harry David Lee; Alcoholics Anonymous founders Bob Smith and Bill W.; land-mine-banning Nobel Prize winner Jody Williams; master painter William Morris Hunt; pioneer snowflake photographer Wilson Bentley; “American Elf” cartoonist James Kolchaka; indie-art sensation Miranda July; entertainer Rudy Vallee; Weather Channel beefcake Jim Cantore; singer-songwriter JoJo (full name: Joanna Noelle Blagden Levesque); skiers Andrea Mead-Lawrence, Suzy "Chapstick" Chaffee and the Cochran family; snowboarder Ross Powers.

Famous Vermont Democrats: 77th governor Madeleine M. Kunin; 79th governor and current Democratic National Committee chairman Howard Dean; senior United States senator Patrick Leahy; United States representative Peter Welch; state House Speaker Gaye Symington; Senate Majority Leader John F. Campbell; Assistant Majority Leader Claire Ayer.

Famous Vermonters With Denver Connections: Colorado silver king Horace W. Tabor; gangland bunko-artist organizer Lou "The Fixer" Blonger; eighth lieutenant governor David H. Nichols; bon vivant and city builder Barbara Mcfarlane; renaissance man Gregory Ego; University of Denver skiing coach David Stewart.

State Nickname: The Green Mountain State (official); Gateway to Montreal, Little Canada, Brrrmont, Vermonster Island (unofficial) Population: 623,908 Racial Distribution: 97% white, 1% black, 1% Asian, 1% Hispanic Per Capita Personal Income: $30,740 Unemployment: 5.6%

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Cory Casciato is a Denver-based writer with a passion for the geeky, from old science fiction movies to brand-new video games.
Contact: Cory Casciato