We Grew Up Here, We Deserve to Thrive Here

I used to think I was the problem.

When college didn’t work out,
When my dream job left me drained and invisible,
When I felt like I was slipping through the cracks in my own hometown,
I figured it must just be me.
Not smart enough.
Not focused enough.
Not built for the systems around me.

But what I’ve come to realize is that those systems weren’t built for me either.

Then I found Ednium,
Or maybe Ednium found me.
And for the first time in a long time
I didn’t feel like I had to be someone else just to be in the room.
I felt like I belonged.

I was born and raised in Denver.
A proud product of DPS and Kunsmiller Creative Arts Academy.
I grew up surrounded by creativity and care.
I had teachers who saw me,
Who encouraged me,
Who reminded me that imagination and leadership could coexist.

But after graduation, the warmth disappeared.
The message became:
Go to college,
Figure it out,
Good luck.

And when college didn’t go as I planned,
I blamed myself.

I enrolled at Metro because that’s what I thought I was supposed to do.
My mom and grandma were social workers.
I was trying to follow the blueprint.
But the reality was jarring.

I was working multiple jobs,
Picking classes at the last minute,
Carrying stress I couldn’t name.
The only place I felt even remotely at home was in Chicano Studies.
Everywhere else reminded me that I wasn’t the kind of student those rooms were designed for.

Eventually, I stepped away.
Not because I wasn’t capable,
But because I was done shrinking myself just to be tolerated.

And Denver,
The city I’ve always loved,
Felt less and less like home.

The places I grew up in weren’t accessible,
The jobs I worked in were filled with people from somewhere else.
The city kept investing in development,
But not in us.
Not in the talent that was already here.

I spent years working in service,
Moved in with my grandma,
Tried to make it make sense.
Then came the so-called dream job:
Office gig,
Benefits
A foot in the door.

But it was only a dream on paper.
The truth was
I was overworked,
Underpaid,
Stuck in environments where I had to code-switch to survive,
Surrounded by white savior energy dressed up as innovation.
Where performative equity statements replaced actual care and culture,
Where I constantly questioned if I was the problem all over again

Then my cousin told me about Ednium’s Leadership Launchpad.
I signed up, hoping it might boost my resume.
I had no idea it would realign my life.

In Ednium, I found what I didn’t know I was missing.
A staff and collective made up entirely of people who are from here.
People who speak Denver’s language,
Who carry our neighborhoods in their stories,
Who understand what it means to make something beautiful out of what we were given.

This matters.
To be led by people who know the city not through policy reports but through lived experience.
To be in rooms that don’t require you to translate your identity to be understood.
To be part of something that doesn’t extract your ideas.
But invites you to expand into your fullest self

Week after week.
I felt myself come back to life.
Not a better version of myself.
Just a more honest one.
A more whole one.

Since then,
I’ve joined the Alumni Council,
Built lifelong friendships.
And when I lost my job earlier this year,
It was the Ednium community who showed up.
Not out of obligation,
But out of love.

Now I’m on a new journey.
One that doesn’t start with a job title,
But with me.
I’m reconnecting with the parts of myself that white and corporate spaces tried to silence.
My creativity.
My rhythm.
My voice.
My joy.

If you’ve ever felt disconnected or disqualified.
If you’ve ever looked around and wondered where your people were.
I want you to know this,
You are not alone.

We were never the problem.
We just needed to be somewhere that didn’t ask us to disappear.

Ednium is not just an organization.
It’s a mirror.
A movement.
A reminder that homegrown leadership doesn’t need to be imported.
It’s already here.
It’s already us.

And we’re just getting started.
Kevin Castaneda is a Chicano artist, performer and community-rooted creative raised in the heart of Denver. A product of Denver Public Schools and the southwest side, he weaves his love for culture, connection and care into everything he touches; whether he’s on stage, behind the scenes or curating spaces where others can shine, his art is about presence, feeling and freedom. Castaneda currently serves on the Alumni Council for Ednium: The Alumni Collective.

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