Denver Public Schools sure have changed. Gone are the neighborhood schools, with their traditional program of teaching the three Rs. Each has been replaced with a shiny new charter school that offers parents a wide array of options to suit their level of fear. The gun-in-the-backpack drill is just one of the many exciting lessons for gifted lifesaving learners at the new Academy of Emergency Preparedness...
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Housed in the former Sabin Elementary School building, the students of the Emergency Preparedness Academy receive training in a wide variety of doomsday scenarios. The curriculum includes sporting-event toxic-gas leaks, aircraft water landings and ski-lift-line microburst triage, to name just a few. However, the students are especially fond of Wildlife Wednesdays.
Each week, a species of urban wildlife in distress (i.e. the clothes-lined elk, the bear with his head stuck in a honey bucket, the meth-addicted raccoon) is let loose in the halls of the charter school. The class seen in the photo above is congratulated by an off-duty Denver Sheriff for its successful subduing of a gun-toting mountain lion. Good work, kids! Next week: Denver School of the Sign Spinning Arts.