Douglas Bruce, the California Democrat turned Colorado Republican, is the embodiment of the classic bad boy character of children's literature. Of course, he isn't trying to be bad, it's just something that's natural. Everyone and everything that comes into contact with him turns out bad, from mail-order brides to constitutional amendments. He hates government regulations and the taxes that pay for them. His story would be the classic fantasy tale of socially awkward, quixotic stumbler who chases after a white rabbit and falls into a constitutional loophole... Chapter 1: Down the Rabbit Hole: Douglas is bored sitting in a Downtown park with his attorney, David Lane, when he notices a talking, clothed White Rabbit with a watch run past. The rabbit is muttering something about tax increases and specials fees, so Douglas follows the rabbit down into a constitutional loophole below... Douglas just steps into the constitutional loophole, when suddenly he falls a long way to a curious City Hall with many locked doors of all sizes. He finds a small key to a door that is too small for him to fit through. But looking through a keyhole, he sees a beautiful court room filled with government workers. On a table next to the door, he discovers a cup labeled "AMENDMENT 60 & 61," the contents of which shrink the power of government to collect taxes. A cake with the words "PROPOSITION 101" on it causes his home and auto taxes to shrink rapidly. So encouraged, he devours both. Page down to see what happens next! Much to his amazement, after swallowing all of Amendments 60 & 61 and Proposition 101, the size of government and his tax bill shrank so quickly that his huge head hit the ceiling and then quickly burst through the roof of the Denver City Hall. Dazed, but still standing, he looks at the ever-shrinking bureaucracy around him and vows to do whatever it takes to get the majority of Coloradans to swallow Amendments 60 & 61 and Proposition 101.
We Believe Local Journalism is Critical to the Life of a City
Engaging with our readers is essential to Westword's mission. Make a financial contribution or sign up for a newsletter, and help us keep telling Denver's stories with no paywalls.
Support Our Journalism
Next Week: Chapter 2: The Pool of Tears.