Dear Mexican: I'm a white girl dating a Mexican from Jalisco who works for my dad. There lies the problem. Dad absolutely dislikes him and totally opposes me dating Ignacio and has been almost rude to him, which I don't like.
Some details now: I often visit Dad at his office, and that's where I met Ignacio, deepest dark eyes that I've ever seen.... We flirted a little, exchanged phone numbers. It was totally natural to start dating him, even if he lives in a not-so-nice place and we have different backgrounds. Of course, Dad gave me a whole speech that night at home: that I should not be talking to people I don't know, what was I thinking, etc. And when we started dating a few days later, Dad got mad, refused to drive me to the mall and so on.
A few days later, Ignacio and I dated again, and we kissed and started our relationship, and my father started to behave like a drama queen, saying he was disappointed, that he thought he'd raised a good, decent girl and such things. I had no option but to call him a racist and sore loser, which I'm sorry now to have said. Dad lectures me about not worrying "about my future" and that I'm "losing it over a beaner," makes a scene many times when I'm going out with Ignacio, and calls my cell phone often to "check out" what I'm doing. He justifies his behavior because I'm his only daughter and says he wants the "best for me" (read: Date a white guy). The fact is that I like my boyfriend a lot and don't see why I need to break up with him just to please my father. It gets complicated because Ignacio says one day he's gonna lose patience and answer Dad back, or worse. What can I do to handle Dad's dramas? And to have him accept my relationship with Ignacio?
Una Confused Gringa
Dear Gabacha: So Nacho is good enough to work for your papi, but not good enough for his daughter? Typical gabacho exploiter... I would flaunt the relationship in front of your dad. Change your name to Xochitl. Blast mariachi in your home. Make your tortillas by hand — better yet, start eating nopales. Totally freak out your dad! But at the same time, be a responsible chica. You didn't specify your age, but given your reference to getting driven to the mall and still living at home, I'll assume you're in high school. So stay away from sex — but if something happens, make sure to use birth control, because Mexican sperm is potent. Keep up your grades. Show Dad that your life won't worsen if a Mexi is your man, and that he's a pendejo for even thinking about it. And remind him that frowning on interracial relationships is so Jim Crow era, and to get with the programa.
Dear Mexican: Why do you frijoleros (being of Iberian descent myself, if you can use gabacho, you've gotta let me use this) assume that white people don't speak Spanish? You would not believe the crap I hear almost every day! We spoke Spanish when the Mexica were still ripping out the hearts of their neighbors.
El Cid Soy
Dear Gachupín: A Spaniard who thinks he's white? HA! You gachupines are as gabacho as Mexicans are infertile.
GOOD MEXICAN OF THE WEEK: Latino Health Access (LHA) is a pioneering nonprofit based in Orange County that has earned national acclaim for its promotora program, which trains community members how to teach healthy living habits in the city's low-income neighborhoods. Last week, the Board of Supervisors declined to agree to a contract with LHA. The group's sin? Using "Latino" in its name — PENDEJO FAIL. Go to latinohealthaccess.net, and then tell the world that the Mexican's American homeland is run by a bola of pendejos — but the world knew that, of course...