Rocky Killer" Polis">

Shmuck of the Week: Jared "Rocky Killer" Polis

Here is an example of a condolence e-card you can find at, the online greeting card company originally founded by the parents of Jared Polis, who's now a first-term Congressman from Colorado's second district:

Memories keep the one you loved close to you in spirit and thought and always in your heart, today and forever. Thinking of you with sympathy

Here's another:

When somebody dies, a cloud turns into an angel, and flies up to tell God to put another flower on a pillow. A bird gives the message back to the world, and sings a silent prayer that makes the rain cry

And another:

I have to say, that when we say, 'Who killed the Rocky Mountain News," we're all part of it, for better or worse, and I argue it's mostly for the better. The media is dead, and long live the new media, which is all of us

Oops! That wasn't a Blue Mountain condolence card, it was Polis's heartfelt eulogy for the News, which ended its 150 year run on February 27.

Polis, who was criticized mightily for his choice of words, later apologized -- sort of -- "to the entire Rocky Mountain News family and anyone who was offended by my recent remarks." He also said, "I did not mean to offend nor to show anything less than a strong sense of remorse for the loss of the Rocky. Like many Colorado residents, I grew up reading the Rocky Mountain News, and its demise and the loss of over 200 jobs is a major blow to our community, especially in these troubled times."

Jared, next time you should just send flowers.

For previous Shmucks, see our Shmuck archive.

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