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Shmuck of the Week: Tom Martino

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Tom, you make us laugh. You make us cry. You make us want to jump off a cliff rather than watch your Lasik infomercials. But your antics over the past two weeks simply made us shake our heads and wonder about your sanity.

You didn't like our recent feature about your connection to the Efusjon drink. You said we got it all wrong. That is fine.

But then you made it a personal vendetta. You lured Westword reporter Jared Jacang Maher to a McDonald's under false pretenses and tried to ambush him on camera, you Hamburglar, you. Then you came to Westword and barked at managing editor Jonathan Shikes. (Hint to Tom: Try calling us up and scheduling an interview, like a normal person.) See the video clip below.

You called us "cowards" for refusing to speak with you. Do you want to know the real reason people run away from you, Tom? It's your breath, man. Get a mint.

Anyway, if you're lurking outside Westword right now, be careful. There is some construction going on here and it's not entirely safe. Plus, there are homeless guys around who tend to relieve themselves in the shadowy corners and sewers around our building.

But then, you know all about the sewer, don't you Tom, our latest Shmuck of the Week.

UPDATE 8-17: Martino posts another video, but fingers the wrong guy as the "cowardly writer." Oops!

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Join the Westword community and help support independent local journalism in Denver.