The holiday lights of Denver's City and County building will stay on through Big Air,but the statues of the nativity scene
If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters.
SHOW ME HOW
You have successfully signed up for your selected newsletter(s) - please keep an eye on your mailbox, we're movin' in!
will be replaced with edgier characters that appeal to snowboarders. A "Living Extreme" decorative theme will focus attention on Denver's mile-high attitude with the snow angel pictured above hovering over a stable of creche-test dummies... As seen in the photograph above, all of the traditionally revered nativity characters have been replaced with extreme creche-test dummies. Even the baby Jesus has been lifted from his manger and propped up on a snowboard. The Three Wise Men, shirtless and wrapped in downtown hotel towels, come bearing gifts of beer, burritos and small but serviceable amounts of medical marijuana. The Santa sleigh pulled by a line of reindeer along the roof of Denver City Hall's entry portico will also be replaced by a line of mannequins performing grabs, flails, fakies and ollies... Removing the plastic Santa and reindeer from the rooftop of the City and County building and replacing them with the plastic snowboarders shown above, will help to brand Denver as THE snowboarding destination for
visitors. To enhance the brand, the nutcracker sculptures tucked into wall recesses will also be replaced with bros and bunnies... The skin displayed by the snowboard sculptures pictured on this page is gratuitous, but necessary to remind Denver Big Air visitors that playing in the freezing cold Colorado snow is somehow hot and sexy.
More from our Kenny Be/Comics archive: "Byers Junior High goes from failed school to the dogs: Kenny Be's Fotochop Friday."