The sh*t-show that's the parking lot at Whole Foods (video)

I've been driving -- and parking -- for dozens of years in dozens of cities around the world, and aside from the time I had to drive a monstrosity of a Volvo wagon down the narrowest street in a tiny English village, the stress of which ultimately forced me to abandon the car entirely, I've never experienced anything like the shit-show that is the parking lot of the Cherry Creek Whole Foods -- singularly the worst parking lot in the city, especially during the holidays.

I was there yesterday afternoon, in fact, to pick up some Honeycrisp apples, pretzel rolls, shrimp spring rolls, coffee, half-and-half and a stinky Époisses de Bourgogne, and in between idiots driving down the parking lanes the wrong way, careening carts doubling as bumper cars, a gentleman who clearly believed that driving a Lexus entitled him to two spots rather than one, and several other muttonheads vying for the same parking wedge -- and refusing to budge -- I spent far more time in that stupid parking lot than I did in the actual store.

There are others who share my pain, including a guy who compiled a four-minute music video of a Whole Foods parking lot in Los Angeles, which is one of the most hilarious things I've ever seen. Really, you gotta watch this.

We use cookies to collect and analyze information on site performance and usage, and to enhance and customize content and advertisements. By clicking 'X' or continuing to use the site, you agree to allow cookies to be placed. To find out more, visit our cookies policy and our privacy policy.


All-access pass to the top stories, events and offers around town.

  • Top Stories


All-access pass to top stories, events and offers around town.

Sign Up >

No Thanks!

Remind Me Later >