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Call us crazy, but we always assumed that K-9 officers were most in danger of getting bitten by dogs. But that wasn’t the case with our latest Schmuck of the Week. Meet Everett Kirby, who’s accused of chomping into the sort of cop who’s presumably very accustomed to avoiding teeth.
See also: Kathleen McGrath Admits Stealing From Booster Club After $170K Embezzling Bust
According to the Colorado Springs Police Department, the incident took place at around 4:30 a.m. January 21 at 819 South Circle Drive, an apartment complex that looks positively bucolic in the interactive graphic embedded below (if you have a hard time seeing it, click “View Larger Map”). Note the two kids playing catch.
The scene the officers found there doesn’t seem to have been nearly that wholesome. They’d been called in regard to a suspected domestic disturbance, and when they knocked, neither Kirby nor an unnamed woman inside would answer the door — at first, anyhow.
Eventually, the woman was coaxed into the hallway, but Kirby still refused to emerge — and there were several good reasons. The CSPD account notes that one felony warrant and two domestic-violence warrants had been issued in his name.
At last, a K-9 officer was called to the scene, and after giving Kirby one more chance to leave the apartment, a dog was “deployed,” in the words of the report.
Seconds later, Kirby “was contacted” by the dog, whose behavior appears to have inspired him: While he was being taken into custody, Kirby allegedly bit the K-9 officer on the hand.
Kirby wasn’t kenneled as punishment for his bad behavior, but close: He was busted on suspicion of second-degree assault, obstruction, resisting arrest and possession of a Schedule II narcotic. He also received treatment at Memorial Hospital, suggesting that the dog may have gotten in a few bites, too.
Woof.
Here’s a look at Kirby’s booking photos.