Fear not (or not as much, anyway): Chances are slim that these stringy hairs are mold or pest by-products.

You know what you are? You’re a sober bully.

“I just bought a THC soda at a movie theater in Minnesota, and other states are passing laws allowing cannabis cafes.”

“It’s been fun smoking weed again, but these dispensary products and methods are total gibberish.”

Spooky, smoky shindigs are easy to find around town this year.

Someone hasn’t come across Peanut Butter Breath at the dispensary yet.

Hitting the real stuff tastes and feels better than vape cartridges, but carts win at convenience.

“How do I go about ensuring each pill is similar in potency and effects?”

“He sent me two or three ‘care packages’ years ago, so I did the same for him while he settled in. But it’s been a year, and he still expects one every month.”

There’s plenty to be excited about this fall, including seasonal cannabis boxes delivered to doorsteps and super-mini rosin gummies.

“The budtender asked me to give them time, but should I jump ship now?”

Most shoppers care more about the potency and burn rate of a joint, but there are some artistically rolled joints out there.

Since medical marijuana was legalized, state officials have blocked connections between tobacco and cannabis.

Instead of coffee or tea in the morning, he prefers hitting a joint. Same same, but different? You tell us.

“I always assumed it was pretty liberal, but my friend who’s a grower says otherwise.”

There are plenty of ways to decline a joint without being a snob.

Our beloved produce can be whipped into delicious THC-infused treats, like green chile, Palisade peach cobbler and cantaloupe bread.

Pre-rolls used to be the hotdogs of legal cannabis. Now it’s vape cartridges.

“Is there anything different about purple cannabis, other than its color?”

“I used to love smoking Purple Haze, Lavender Haze, Silver Haze and many more. Now I’m lucky to come across a Haze vape pen.”

Haven’t they always?

From old dabbing setups to novelty bongs and joints, there are plenty of pot fads that come and go.