Music News

'80s hair band Whitesnake now in the wine business. Really.

In possibly the strangest bid to return to relevance in the history of pop culture, Whitesnake, famed for its luscious hair, generic hair-metal anthems and Tawny Kitaen-filled music videos (see above), is trying to make a comeback. Not with a new album (god forbid) but with a delicious alcoholic beverage. Starting July 1, you too can enjoy some Whitesnake Zinfandel, a really, truly real thing that only sounds like an April Fools joke.

You might think it would be $2-a-bottle plonk good only for intoxicating underage groupies and possibly cleaning engine parts, but you'd be wrong. The stuff retails for about $25 a pop -- that's like a dollar for each year since the last time anyone even thought about Whitesnake! Can't speak to its quality, obviously, since it isn't for sale for a few days yet.

So is this fated to become the new comeback bid? Forgo a new album and/or tour, just market a random product vaguely related to your name? How far will it go? Will we be seeing Glass Tiger Balm at drugstores soon? Maybe Night Ranger will offer a sleep aid? How long until we're serving up Meatloaf-brand meatloaf?

Okay, that last one would actually make sense.

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Cory Casciato is a Denver-based writer with a passion for the geeky, from old science fiction movies to brand-new video games.
Contact: Cory Casciato