Charlie Sheen at Wells Fargo on April 28

Oh dear Lord, brace yourselves: Charlie Sheen is bringing his winning ways to Denver. His Violent Torpedo of Truth/Defeat Is Not An Option tour -- or as we like to call it, his "Holy Shit! I Really Fucked Myself there But Good, Didn't I? Better Come Up with a Cheap Way to Make Some Quick Loot Before My Once Bright Star Fades" tour -- is slated to make a stop at the Wells Fargo Theater on Thursday, April 28. Tiger Blood stock just went through the roof in Denver. Hold on to your strippers.

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