Commentary

I wanna get freaky with you: The ten most WTF-worthy lyrics of '90s-era R&B

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6. Babyface - "Whip Appeal"

"Keep on whippin' on me. Work it on me. Whip all your sweet, sweet lovin' on me. We got a way of talking and it's better than words. It's the strangest kind of relationship. Oh, but with us, it always works."

Long before Fifty Shades of Grey made BDSM acceptably edgy to bored housewives, Babyface was dropping some truth on the masses with his not-so-subtle "Whip Appeal." Other New Jack Swing artists romance their lady folk with the usual suspects: massages, baths, silk robes, white wine. Babyface is interested in something a little more sinister.

5. Another Bad Creation - "Playground"

"Suckers on the corner looking down at their beepers. They couldn't get a job or a nice home, so they wanna stay and wait for the pay phone"

Remember: this is a song sung by legitimate children whose previous hit, "Iesha," was about wooing a girl with cereal and Nintendo (which remains to this day, incidentally, my idea of a dream date). Suddenly in this song, they're hardened gangsters who play on a playground frequented by drug dealers. Um, wut?

4. Wrecks 'N Effect - "New Jack Swing"

"It's the New Jack Swing. Was it something wrong that she can clean?"

Wait, what? Not only does it make no sense, but it doesn't even rhyme, so you can't really use that as an excuse. Does he want to know if New Jack Swing is something a woman can clean? Does he want to know if there's something wrong with the funky fresh beats of 1990s R&B? (Hint: There most definitely is not.) Maybe he needs to chat with H-Town about the towels they want ladies to bust out.

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Ashley Rogers