When the St. Pauli Girl, the six-foot-tall Russian vixen charged with promoting St. Pauli beer, needed to shamelessly promote her product through a friendly game of beer pong, she called Westword's Adam Cayton-Holland, because who the hell else would you call? Hickenlooper? Too busy. Jay Cutler? Too diabetic. No, you call Cayton-Holland, because he delivers. He's also available. But mostly he delivers.

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Watch the video from his experience in the latest Vlog the Impaler after the jump. See a slideshow at westword.com/slideshow. And, if you're into reading, that's sorta weird, but you'll enjoy Cayton-Holland's most recent What's So Funny column, which chronicles the adventure.