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At 7:30 a.m. this morning, just over three months after his rib-rattling bicycle accident, Governor Bill Ritter is scheduled to talk about Bike to Work Day at the Civic Center breakfast station at Civic Center Park.
No, we don't anticipate that he'll collapse in hysterics from a bad case of PTBCS (Post Traumatic Bike Crash Syndrome). But here are the top five announcements we expect him to make.
5. Introduction of scientifically advanced Nerf curbs at all Colorado intersections.
4. Two-wheelers in Denver's ambitious B-cycle program to be outfitted with air bags.
3. Research funding made available to develop Kevlar biking clothes.
2. Future governors to peddle to work on stationary bike mounted in back of state-owned truck.
1. Bike to Work Day still safer than Bus to Work Day.
Keep Westword Free... Since we started Westword, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Denver, and we would like to keep it that way. Offering our readers free access to incisive coverage of local news, food and culture. Producing stories on everything from political scandals to the hottest new bands, with gutsy reporting, stylish writing, and staffers who've won everything from the Society of Professional Journalists' Sigma Delta Chi feature-writing award to the Casey Medal for Meritorious Journalism. But with local journalism's existence under siege and advertising revenue setbacks having a larger impact, it is important now more than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" membership program, allowing us to keep covering Denver with no paywalls.