Dear Stoner: How Can I Get the Weed Smell Out of My Car?

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Dear Stoner: I really want to try my hand at growing my own, but I live across the street from an elementary school. What am I supposed to?

Dear Jamey: Once cultivating marijuana became legal under the Colorado Constitution in 2012, you’ve been allowed to grow marijuana in your home no matter where you live — as long as you’re the homeowner or have permission from the homeowner. Think of it this way: Can a homeowner brew beer on his/her property if it’s near a school? The answer is yes, so what makes growing recreational marijuana any different — other than years of uneducated prohibition?

Now, that doesn’t mean you can throw cannabis seeds in your back yard and go to work. You still have to follow home-cultivation regulations as defined by state and municipal laws. At the very least, you’ll have to secure your grow in a private, enclosed space that is inaccessible to anyone under 21. And remember, no more than six plants if you’re by yourself — three flowering and three in vegetation. The basement usually works out best for home operations, but if you’re set on outdoor growing, look into lockable greenhouses.

Dear Stoner: Read your answer about smoking without the smell last week, but what can I do about removing the smell from my car? I don’t smoke in it, but it reeks every time I leave weed in there for more than thirty minutes.

Dear TC: You don’t like the smell of skunky jet fuel after a long day? I suppose it can be quite a tease if you have a long drive ahead of you. Still, I’d love to have Durban Poison or Texas Hash Plant air fresheners — but that’s just me.

If you don’t want your friends, family, dates, Uber passengers, etc., smelling your stoner habits when they’re in your ride, throw your weed bottles in a Mason jar — and throw that jar in the trunk. Even if you were already keeping your stash locked in a childproof container, it’s still better to keep it in the back in case an overzealous cop pulls you over and notices it. (Think of it as an open container of beer.) If you’re too lazy to walk to your trunk, leave some fast food on the front seat for a half-hour or so. You could also smoke a cigarette, but I like the smell of french fries more.

Have questions for our Stoner? Send them to marijuana@westword.com, or call our potline at 303­293­-2222.

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