Thomas Mitchell
Audio By Carbonatix
Denver Broncos fans have been on an emotional roller coaster this week, winning a playoff game against Josh Allen in spectacular fashion…only to learn that starting quarterback Bo Nix fractured his ankle in the final minutes of the game. The situation isn’t exactly rosy as the New England Patriots come to town for the AFC Championship on Sunday, January 25, but Jarret Stidham is one of the higher-paid backup quarterbacks in the league, and Broncos fans are becoming more confident as the freezing-cold day nears.
Confident enough to play a drinking game, perhaps?
Whether it’s alcohol, Topo Chicos or bong rips, Coloradans have plenty to choose from while watching the game at home — and the broadcast will provide plenty of reasons to tilt back your glass, too. After all, Tony Romo is calling the game, and we all know how fun it is when referees insert themselves into second-half action. From poorly-called Riley Moss penalties to each shot of Bo Nix watching in the owner’s box, here are your times to chug, swig or take a shot during the AFC Championship on Sunday.
Chug
Every time Bo Nix is shown
Broadcasters love showing an injured star as he watches his team play, especially when the injury is recent — and especially in the playoffs. If Nix is at the game in the owner’s box or on the sidelines, which he probably will be, expect to see him shown early and often. Not quite the level of Taylor Swift in 2024, but plenty of Nix will be shoved down your throat. It will be too sad and frequent for this to be in the “shot” category, so an earnest chug should suffice.
Every Patriots turnover
Cause for celebration! Cheers!
Every time CBS shows footage of past Patriots vs. Broncos games
This is a classic move to fill time between b-roll footage of Union Station or overhead shots of Mile High Stadium or Burnham Yard, where the Broncos plan to move. Given how often the two teams have played each other (five times, with a 4-1 record in favor of Denver) and how well the Broncos fared in those games, two of which included Peyton Manning and Tom Brady, producers will probably play clips of old games more than once, but fewer than five times.
Swig
Every time Tony Romo says “Jim!” in an excited tone
“Let’s go, Jim!” “Time for some championship football, Jim!
“Big Gulps, Jim? All right!”
Tony Romo is an excitable color commentator. Some people like it, some people don’t. I love the guy, whether he’s focused on the game at hand or not, and every time I hear him say play-by-play partner Jim Nantz’s first name, a shit-eating grin stretches my face. Time for a swig, because this happens too often for a chug or shot.
Every time Sean Payton’s genius is mentioned
Look, he’s obviously a smart guy who knows football. But Sean Payton is kind of a dick, and NFL coaches love to smell their own farts at an unhealthy rate. Whatever. I don’t want a friendly coach, and if you can get a backup quarterback to the Super Bowl, maybe you are a genius, just like Jim and Tony said for the fifth time. Salud.
Shot
Every Riley Moss pass interference penalty
Playing cornerback on the other side of the field of Patrick Surtain II is an ugly job, but someone’s got to do it. Opposing quarterbacks barely look on the side of the field in which Surtain, the NFL’s reigning Defensive Player of the Year, is on, leaving Riley Moss targeted throughout games. The third-year defensive back plays hard-nosed and aggressively, but he’s quite technical and respected by football writers.
Still, Moss seems to have a rep with referees, who have flagged him twelve times this season, ten of which were for pass interference. Several of the calls were soft, to say the least (recalling one against the New York Giants in October is an easy way to goad Broncos fans), and many of us have our own theories as to why refs like to pick him on him. If and when it happens on Sunday, pour one out (and into your mouth) for our dawg, Riley. He never had a chance.
Every Broncos turnover
Let’s hope this doesn’t happen too much, but this is sad shot territory. Broncos Country. Let’s drink!
…Oh, and responsibly.
