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Fracking Aurora is a natural gas: Kenny Be's Worst-Case Scenario

On Thursday, June 23, 2011, the Colorado Oil & Gas Conservation Commission will explain how hydraulic fracturing (fracking) operations on the former Lowry Bombing Range comply with Arapahoe County's 2007 Sustainable Growth Objectives. It will be an easy sell...

The Lowry bombing range sits on top of numerous aquifers, and there are plans in place to build several more reservoirs within its boundaries for future population growth. The 39 billion gallons of fresh water needed to drill 98 oil wells on the 26,000 acres of land surrounding the Aurora Reservoir will be trucked in by tankers and thereby preserve reservoir water for the recreational needs of swimmers and fishermen.

To appease image-conscious Aurora officials, the frack tanks (needed to store the 39.8 billion gallons of water contaminated with 2 million gallons of toxic fracking agents) can be arranged to look like happy housing housing subdivisions (and not an industrialized wasteland) for the benefit of airline passengers en route to a landing at DIA. Below, Flaming environmentalists and home sprinkler systems... While a minority of angry environmentalists will blame the sudden increase of methane in the tap water on fracking operations, the flames shooting out of lawn sprinklers will be a great reminder to Aurora residents to conserve water. Below, the history of heavy industry in creating jobs and future wildlife refuges... Fracking on the former Lowry Bombing Range will bring jobs and economic growth to Aurora right now, and will create an environmental refuge that for future generations that is as popular as the Rocky Flats and Rocky Mountain Arsenal sacrifice zones.

The public is invited to hear Colorado Gas & Oil Conservation Commission's pitch to the State Review of Oil and Natural Gas Environmental Regulation panel at the Colorado State Land Board offices, 1127 Sherman Street, Suite 200, on Thursday, June 23, 2011 at 11 a.m.

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More from our Kenny Be/Comics archive: "Kayakers vs. tubers at Clear Creek Whitewater Park: Kenny Be's Worst-Case Scenario."

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