Speaker Designee Frank McNulty, R-Highlands Ranch, thinks Republican candidates are selling like hot-cakes, so he has jacked the the House and created a huge flap by renaming committees to better represent the priorities of the Republican Party.
Democrats are saying that McNulty may have buttered his short stack a bit too early. He is claiming a 33-32 razor-thin lead over the House Democrats, but that 33rd win represents the seat of the House District 29 race, where Democrat Debbie Benefield is down by 208 votes, with 687 votes still uncounted.
Undaunted, Rep. McNulty is pouring on the syrup. Look below to see the names of the new committees and their newly appointed chairs...
Old Name: House Agriculture, Livestock and Natural Resources Committee New Name: House Agricultural Tax Loophole and Natural Resource Extraction Committee McNulty: "I am appointing Rep. Cheri Gerou, R-Evergreen. She will be a tireless advocate of undeserved tax reductions for the residents of pricey subdivisions, and the return of tax-breaks from solar panel and wind turbine manufacturers to the oil and gas companies who have donated to
my campaign this state's prosperity."
Old Name: House Appropriations Committee New Name: House Inappropriations Committee McNulty: "Reps. Larry Liston and Kent Lambert, R-Colorado Springs, will both bring disrespect and lack of concern to all unwed mothers and homosexuals seeking special treatment, through their use of inappropriate reactionary comments."
Old Name: House Business Affairs and Labor Committee New Name: House Economic and Business Development Committee McNulty: "With no regard or respect for Colorado workers, Rep. Spencer Swalm, R-Centennial, will vigorously rub his magic lamp and ask the GOP genie to deliver the magic beans needed to grow Colorado's economic recovery."
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Old Name: House Education Committee New Name: House Religious Voucher and Judiciary Committee McNulty: "Rep. Carol Murray, R-Castle Rock, is confident that she can win the voucher fight and clear the activist judges from the Colorado Supreme Court simultaneously."
Old Name: House Health and Human Services Committee New Name: House Health and Environmental Committee McNulty: "Rep. Ken Summers, R-Lakewood, knows that when push comes to shove, taxpayers prefer funding dog parks over disability service centers."
Old Name: House Transportation and Energy Center New Name: House Transportation and Drill, Baby, Drill Committee McNulty: "Rep. Marsha Looper, R-Calhan, is well aware that Colorado's greatness comes from the ability of it's citizens to drive gas-guzzling vehicles for work and play."
More from our Kenny Be/Comics archive: "John Elway, Josh McDaniels honored at Denver Film Festival: Kenny Be's Fotoshop Friday."