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Jobbed: These boots were made for lifting at Forever 21

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Having trouble finding work? You're not alone. Follow Jobbed every week as we troll for the weird, the wacky and the worst of what the recession-era world of job ads has to offer.

The Job, as posted online: Forever 21 Loss Prevention Store Investigator

Responsibilities: Apprehension of shoplifters; conduct Internal audits; Investigate issues of suspected internal theft. Prepare written reports. Review accounting and sales audit reports, including over/shorts, credit card charge backs, missing deposits, bank errors, gift cards, store credits, voids, refunds, and various other reports to identify potential theft issues. Assist Corporate Loss Prevention Conduct LP training for Store management and Sales Associates Promote the corporate Shrink Awareness program. Work with District Manager and Store Managers on identifying areas of opportunity for loss within the stores and developing an action plan for reducing those opportunities.

Qualifications: 1-3 years experience in the Loss Prevention field. Ability to act independently. Knowledge of Word and Excel computer programs. NYS Certificate

Pay: TBD

What it doesn't say: This is the perfect opportunity to score Forever 21 stuff for free because who would ever suspect the narc? The staff will hate you for ratting them out, but your friends will love you when you shower them with blouses, hoodies and sweater dresses. And we know you've got your eyes on those faux leather cage pumps yourself -- although it's hard to chase down shoplifters while you're wearing them.

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