The Job, as seen online: Personal assistant to high-profile television personality
Pay: Salary is competitive and will reflect experience.
Qualifications: One to two years experience as a personal assistant; strong written and verbal communication skills; solid computer skills; available to travel two weeks a month to either Colorado or Hawaii and for shorter trips to Los Angeles; maturity and personality to represent the brand in public; great phone voice; attention to detail; able to multi-task and meet deadlines, maintain confidentiality and take direction but work with minimal supervision; commitment to excellent customer service.
Responsibilities: This is a unique opportunity for someone to work as both a personal assistant and in conjunction with an established reality television show. Ideal candidate would work as a liaison between the person they are assisting and the television production crew. The tasks and errands include, but are not limited to shopping, dry cleaning, filing, scanning, picking up packages, helping with appearance related issues (hair, wardrobe) and writing correspondences. Since the candidate selected will be running errands, the candidate must also have a valid driver's license.
What it doesn't say: Well, it doesn't say who the "television personality is" or what show he or she is on, but our guess -- using the clue about Hawaii -- is that it's for Denver native Duane "Dog" Chapman, America's favorite crime, uh, fighter and star of A&E's Dog the Bounty Hunter. Chapman works in Colorado, Hawaii and L.A., and he could certainly use help with good communication skills given his 2007 phone tirade about a black woman, in which he used the N-word. That got his show canceled for six months and nearly killed his careers.
But apologies were made and accepted for that, and Dog is back on the air. Which means his assistant will only have to deal with one of the biggest mullets ("appearance-related issues"), and over-sized egos, this side of Bail Bond Row.