The woman, who was overheard saying she hadn't slept in three days and had taken some pills given to her by a friend, threw herself on the floor in front of the cockpit and began screaming and kicking — after which she stripped naked.
To our knowledge, there's no such video of Joseph Wayne Lynch's escapades while traveling to Denver last summer, and that's too bad, because his actions — including kissing an unwilling flight attendant, a series of drunken rants and more — were certainly memorable.
Indeed, they were memorable enough to earn Lynch a stint in federal prison, not to mention our latest Schmuck of the Week honors.
On August 4, 2015, according to the U.S. Attorney's Office, Lynch boarded a U.S. Airways flight from Philadelphia to Denver — and he did so in style. After he'd missed his previous flight, the airline had upgraded his seat to first class.
But his behavior didn't deserve the same description.
Indeed, the U.S. Attorney's Office notes that he was acting so strangely, and speaking so loudly, that a decision was quickly made to limit his alcohol intake during the flight.
After the jet was airborne, the office's account continues, Lynch "swapped seats to sit next to a young lady with whom he wanted to strike up a conversation." But he apparently didn't become more charming, since the flight attendants subsequently decided to cut him off the booze entirely.
Over the period that followed, Lynch was accused of repeatedly putting his hand on the small of the flight attendant's back before grabbing her and kissing her neck, as well as unleashing a slew of profanities so deafening that the flight crew inside the cockpit couldn't hear radio traffic even when wearing noise-canceling headphones.
Things got so out of hand that flight attendants armed themselves with — and no, we're not making this up — an ice hammer, a pot of hot coffee and plastic handcuffs, and recruited "two able-bodied passengers" to help in case he became even more exercised.
Lynch wasn't put off by this show of force. He's quoted as repeatedly barking, "Let's go!" He also claimed to have been a former member of the Green Berets (he wasn't), showed off what he said were bullet wounds and displayed "a photo of his pot farm."
Things got so bad that the plane's captain temporarily turned over flying duties to the first officer, locked down the cockpit, and requested that law enforcement be waiting at the gate at Denver International Airport upon the jet's arrival. They were — and Lynch allegedly "redirected his threats and anger toward them" once they took him into custody.
A jury found Lynch guilty of interfering with a flight crew in February, and this week, he learned his sentence: four months in prison.
We're guessing the accommodations won't be first class this time.
Here are Lynch's booking photos.